It has been suggested that the NYC MeFites take a trip to Guy Fieri's American Kitchen & Bar. It is in Times Square, the food is bad, and the prices are outrageous. Who's in?
posted by griphus to Meetup (449 comments total)
11 users marked this as a favorite
This is just dumb enough that I could see myself doing it. posted by Greg Nog at 12:19 PM on November 14, 2012 [9 favorites]
I'll give this thing 24-hrs before we start working on a time/date. posted by griphus at 12:28 PM on November 14, 2012
I'd consider it.
How outrageous?
Also, since he's a celebrity chef, how long is the wait for reservations? posted by zarq at 12:40 PM on November 14, 2012
I mean, are we talking Alain Ducasse outrageous? posted by zarq at 12:40 PM on November 14, 2012
Menu. Prices aren't bad for NYC. And they have rice pudding. It's hard to screw up rice pudding. posted by zarq at 12:43 PM on November 14, 2012
It's tourist-expensive, not like expensive-expensive. Here's the menu.
Also, zarq, I owe you a drink from some thread from a long, long time ago. posted by griphus at 12:44 PM on November 14, 2012
To . . . firebomb it? This just sounds horrible. I mean obviously I will solve my issue by just not coming, but I can't help gawp in this thread. posted by grobstein at 12:48 PM on November 14, 2012
It's hard to screw up rice pudding.
Ten bucks says it's a pint glass full of uncooked rice floating in non-dairy creamer with an american flag pokin' outta the top posted by Greg Nog at 12:51 PM on November 14, 2012 [22 favorites]
Oh that's so weird. TPS, Cunning linguist and I were just talking about going there on facebook yesterday. posted by gaspode at 12:52 PM on November 14, 2012
This just sounds horrible.
Yes, just to make things absolutely clear, we will be going to the most annoying part of New York City to spend our hard-earned dollars on overpriced, poorly-conceived menu items that Carolus Linnaeus would classify as Shitty. posted by griphus at 12:54 PM on November 14, 2012 [3 favorites]
oh look a romaine salad named after weed for $17 posted by elizardbits at 1:32 PM on November 14, 2012 [5 favorites]
Let me clarify: we were talking about going there to enjoy the horror in its full glory. posted by gaspode at 1:51 PM on November 14, 2012
And to relate the horror for the amusement of the rest of us on this site, I can't emphasize that part enough. posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish at 2:07 PM on November 14, 2012 [3 favorites]
griphus: " Also, zarq, I owe you a drink from some thread from a long, long time ago."
I don't remember that, but woo!
Perhaps alcohol will deaden my taste buds enough to enjoy the food! :D posted by zarq at 3:10 PM on November 14, 2012
On the night of the meetup, at 7:23pm, seven nearly-identical questions will be posted at once.
"Urgent. I'm at a restaurant in Times Square. Tell me hive mind, Should I Eat This?" posted by zarq at 3:15 PM on November 14, 2012 [7 favorites]
If this happens any time in or around Thanksgiving weekend, I'm in. I'll be visiting NYC then and this sounds like too epic an experience to pass up. posted by sheprime at 5:38 PM on November 14, 2012
I'd be down for this. Haven't been to a meet up in a while and this might be either the best way to make a meet up return, or I end up hating everyone for even suggesting this as an "experience" and never come to a meet up again. posted by kkokkodalk at 6:10 PM on November 14, 2012
I hate him, I hate him, I hate him, I hate him, and I will come to this if it happens. posted by mintcake! at 7:26 PM on November 14, 2012 [1 favorite]
I can't wait to get a headcount on this.
"Hello, Guy's American Kitchen and Bar? Reservation for ten please."
"May I ask why?" posted by griphus at 8:00 PM on November 14, 2012 [7 favorites]
I don't understand giving money to someone you loathe. Money doesn't have a sense of irony. posted by Eideteker at 3:06 AM on November 15, 2012 [1 favorite]
Or is the goal to prove you can be a more contemptible person than Fieri? posted by Eideteker at 3:09 AM on November 15, 2012 [1 favorite]
It's the same reasoning behind boxing a kangaroo. Obviously I'm in for either one. posted by Potomac Avenue at 3:24 AM on November 15, 2012
I'm in for a maybe. posted by TrishaLynn at 3:57 AM on November 15, 2012
Or is the goal to prove you can be a more contemptible person than Fieri?
oh man I looked at the pricing and this is the kind of place where you can only afford a drink OR a food
solution: bring flask, don't order food either posted by the young rope-rider at 5:41 AM on November 15, 2012
Please confirm whether takeout containers are shaped like pointed goatees posted by shakespeherian at 5:50 AM on November 15, 2012
People could cope with the pricing by only getting side dishes or appetizers. If I do this I may go just to order dessert - because I am optimistic that it's harder to screw dessert up, but on the other hand if he does I'll be that much angrier and I'll be that much of a bigger foaming rage. posted by EmpressCallipygos at 6:03 AM on November 15, 2012
If I might comment on this admirable plan from o'er the waves, I would like to respectfully request that you sculpt a part-portion of roasted garlic mash into a likeness of quidnunc kid and treat said fetish-totem as my avatar throughout this meetup. I am prepared to paypal someone $7.50 plus labor and tax for this purpose. posted by the quidnunc kid at 6:05 AM on November 15, 2012
I'm kinda interested. Because I'm a masochist, you see.
No no no, you want the Paddles meetup posted by modernserf at 7:01 AM on November 15, 2012
I hope you'll match the bill, dollar-for-dollar, in donations to Sandy relief or something. Or really, if you can afford to do that, just give the money to charity and not to some worthless faux celebrity fuck. posted by Eideteker at 7:03 AM on November 15, 2012 [2 favorites]
Look, I get the irritation, but at the same time we live in a country that is built on exploitation and it's not like you've never bought something that is luxurious/unnecessary/jokey before. So if we're going to go the whole "eating in restaurants is inherently evil" route that's cool, but let's not confuse your aesthetic preferences with moral principles. posted by the young rope-rider at 7:06 AM on November 15, 2012 [8 favorites]
I don't get the irritation at a bunch of friends having fun, sorry.
I guarantee that Paddles will be child's play compared to the unholy torture I'll be experiencing after ingesting a plate of Guy-talian Nachos. posted by Consonants Without Vowels at 7:16 AM on November 15, 2012 [1 favorite]
Eideteker: "I hope you'll match the bill, dollar-for-dollar, in donations to Sandy relief or something. Or really, if you can afford to do that, just give the money to charity and not to some worthless faux celebrity fuck."
So..... you're in?
I may also be, depending on the timing. posted by Grither at 7:17 AM on November 15, 2012
I dunno guys. Maybe we should rethink this if Guy Fieri will be there personally showing us to our table, pouring us water, taking our order, cooking our food, serving us our food, cleaning up after us, and then burning the money we give him in front of homeless people. I don't know if that totally accurate scenario of restaurant ownership I just described is something I want to be a part of. posted by griphus at 7:18 AM on November 15, 2012 [2 favorites]
Guys what if I fly to New York just for this meetup and then fly back immediately after posted by shakespeherian at 7:18 AM on November 15, 2012 [4 favorites]
I swear to god I will buy your food and maybe half your drinks shakes. posted by griphus at 7:19 AM on November 15, 2012 [1 favorite]
I don't understand the exploitation thing. I sure hope you're not saying some exploitation makes more OK. I'm objecting to:
1) People throwing money at a known jerk. Y'know, ironically. Because lol?
2) The hatred and the negativity. You may not find gawking at a train wreck reprehensible, but I do. If you can do something to help, get in there and help. Otherwise move on.
3) Wasting money. I know I'm not the only person here who grew up poor, but I have a hard time lavishing money on an irrational expense when it could be put to better use. It's your money, and you're free to spend it however; but likewise, I'm free to call you out on irresponsible and spiteful behavior publicly.
This is pretty much a perfect example of why people hate hipsters. Let's all gang up and make fun of something! Or else: Aren't we all smart and clever for hating all the right things! It's not cute. posted by Eideteker at 7:20 AM on November 15, 2012 [2 favorites]
An irrational expense? Dude, you own a motorcycle in a city that has world-class public transit. Come on. posted by the young rope-rider at 7:25 AM on November 15, 2012 [15 favorites]
HORRIBLE PEOPLE EATING HORRIBLE FOOD FOR HORRIBLE REASONS. posted by The Whelk at 7:27 AM on November 15, 2012 [9 favorites]
Yes, we are free to spend it however! Personally, I will be spending my money by giving a generous tip to some poor soul who has to drag their ass out to the loudest, most obnoxious restaurant in Times Square on a daily basis to wait on tourists who pretend that they don't know how tipping works. I'm such an irresponsible, spiteful dick in that way. posted by griphus at 7:30 AM on November 15, 2012 [3 favorites]
Also, I mean, I can't talk, I have the no. 1 luxury (a middle-class kid in a first world country). The amount of cash we drop on diapers and organic fucking peas alone would probably fund an extended family in many, many areas of the world. Pretty much no one here has a decent basis to be lecturing anyone else about how they spend their money.
So let's just move the fuck on to finding out what the quidunc kid looks like so I can get me some mad mashed potatoes cash. posted by the young rope-rider at 7:31 AM on November 15, 2012 [4 favorites]
Yeah, I never claimed to be a nice or good person, so I'm ok with this.
Also, I have the mustache going strong right now, so I really CAN be called a hipster! posted by Grither at 7:31 AM on November 15, 2012
I'm not sure why, but I've always pictured him looking like Telly Savalas. posted by griphus at 7:33 AM on November 15, 2012
"An irrational expense? Dude, you own a motorcycle in a city that has world-class public transit. Come on."
Transit doesn't go everywhere. And really, is that the best you can do? What you're doing isn't horrible because someone else is doing something that could also be considered irresponsible? So basically your argument is that two wrongs make a right? posted by Eideteker at 7:34 AM on November 15, 2012
If you are so het up about helping, maybe you can make your own thread about a thanksgiving soup kitchen volunteering meetup for NYC mefites? I'm sure there will be a lot of opportunities to help out over the next few weeks while people are still recovering from the hurricane, especially with the holiday season approaching.
Just saying, it would be a lot more productive than relentlessly shitting in this thread. posted by elizardbits at 7:34 AM on November 15, 2012 [2 favorites]
Eideteker:
1. I spent the better part of a Saturday putting in manpower helping my kayak club in Red Hook clean up after our boat shed flooded and got washed 20 yards down the street. I also then helped one of the members in the club clean up her flooded basement.
2. I spent an additional sum of money donating much-needed blankets to a shelter in my neighborhood. I threw in an additional sum to purchase some simple card games for the people forced to evacuate there - all of them residents of a nursing home in Coney Island. they are currently having to make do with sheltering in the gym at Brooklyn Tech, and I figure that's depressing and so a few decks of cards may cheer them up.
3. I will be alone on Thanksgiving and plan on putting in further manpower in Red Hook helping the crews from Occupy Sandy there.
Please tell me where I may submit this as a Karma Offset sufficient to purchase $15 for a goofy sundae so that I may have a break from things for a change. Thank you. posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:36 AM on November 15, 2012 [3 favorites]
I think the joke will work equally well if we all just show up and begin to rub the outside of the restaurant like the apes reacting to the monolith in 2001 posted by The Whelk at 7:41 AM on November 15, 2012 [3 favorites]
I once set an orphanage on fire, can I eat dumb food now? posted by shakespeherian at 7:41 AM on November 15, 2012 [2 favorites]
shakespeherian = voldemort posted by elizardbits at 7:43 AM on November 15, 2012
What you're doing isn't horrible because someone else is doing something that could also be considered irresponsible?
Ironically this is the exact same thing you are using as a defense from this argument. posted by elizardbits at 7:46 AM on November 15, 2012
The real irony is that motorcycles only run on the blood of the innocent. Think about it, man. posted by shakespeherian at 7:50 AM on November 15, 2012 [1 favorite]
So, anyway, did anyone pick what they want to order yet? I don't know whether to go by "stupidest name" or "most bizarre combination of ingredients."
Also, what day/time is good for everyone? I'd prefer a Sunday afternoon if it is all the same. posted by griphus at 7:52 AM on November 15, 2012
hahaha from the bottom of the menu:
We want our Guests to dine with us in confidence. posted by lalex at 7:56 AM on November 15, 2012 [2 favorites]
good because I'm allergic to sincerity posted by mintcake! at 8:00 AM on November 15, 2012
You're going to have to get something that's marked as a signature dish, right? posted by shakespeherian at 8:00 AM on November 15, 2012 [1 favorite]
GUY'S SIGNATURE "ICE TO MEET YOU" AGUA: $7.95
Room-temperature tap water served with ice cubes in a cup. No refills. posted by griphus at 8:03 AM on November 15, 2012 [2 favorites]
I can't believe you people are being so blithe about this. You're going to eat Guy Fieri's Donkey Sauce when some people don't even have ANY Donkey Sauce? There are people in NYC, right now, who would kill for just a tablespoon of Donkey Sauce.
You can go to this meetup if you want, but I've just made a big batch of Donkey Sauce, and will be handing out Donkey Sauce to the elderly at a number of nursing homes around the city. Just filling red Solo cups full of Donkey Sauce, handing them to wizened old people with gross wrinkle faces (that I find BEAUTIFUL), looking them in the eyes, and telling them "Hey -- I care" as I push the cup of Donkey Sauce into their shaking brittle fingers.
Is it a heroic act, distributing Donkey Sauce to OUR NATION'S seniors? Well, I don't like the "h"-word; I would prefer not to be called a "hero", or an "exemplar of decency", or an "angel in human form". I'm just a man. Just a man with a ladle and some cups and about four and a half gallons of Donkey Sauce.
If, years from now, some small schoolchild wants to do a report on me and my Donkey Sauce (maybe with a diorama? in a shoebox?), then maybe, just maybe, the world will think about everyone who does or not have Donkey Sauce. And maybe that little spark in the classroom will grow into a fire. (metaphor) And that fire is the distribution of Donkey Sauce, and -- hey, who's that, in the back of the classroom? Who's that hooded figure sipping at a big glass of Donkey Sauce? Is it... me? Who can say? All he does is wink, and then he's gone. He was just here. Like a legend. Maybe this world isn't so different after all. posted by Greg Nog at 8:10 AM on November 15, 2012 [33 favorites]
Eideteker: "I don't understand the exploitation thing. I sure hope you're not saying some exploitation makes more OK. I'm objecting to:
...
3) Wasting money. I know I'm not the only person here who grew up poor, but I have a hard time lavishing money on an irrational expense when it could be put to better use. It's your money, and you're free to spend it however; but likewise, I'm free to call you out on irresponsible and spiteful behavior publicly.
Hi. You don't know me. We've never met. You don't have a clue what underlying motivation(s) I might have for going to a metafilter meetup at any given restaurant or bar.
Before judging, ask questions. And if you can't be bothered, don't presume. posted by zarq at 8:11 AM on November 15, 2012
Sunday is my only day off, so that is what I would prefer, but I can also do Saturday night. Or breakfast!
When I get a chance to look at the menu I will pick a fountain drink. posted by the young rope-rider at 8:17 AM on November 15, 2012
Weekday evening is easiest for me. Whether I can make a weekend day or night will depend on what weekend it is. posted by zarq at 8:18 AM on November 15, 2012
I don't know Greg is it made with real donkeys? posted by The Whelk at 8:20 AM on November 15, 2012 [1 favorite]
I am vegetarian so I would like tofonkey sauce, if possible. posted by mintcake! at 8:23 AM on November 15, 2012 [3 favorites]
Breakfast would actually be hilarious there but I don't think they open until 11ish like everything else in that ghastly neighborhood. posted by elizardbits at 8:24 AM on November 15, 2012
Hours:
Sun - Wed: 11:30 am - Midnight
Thurs - Sat: 11:30 am - 1:00 am posted by zarq at 8:30 AM on November 15, 2012
we all have hangovers and spooky raccoon eyes. posted by The Whelk at 8:30 AM on November 15, 2012 [1 favorite]
let's just move the fuck on to finding out what the quidnunc kid looks like so I can get me some mad mashed potatoes cash
I actually look like a mound of roasted potato mash.
So, yeah ... this is not a difficult task, I guess. posted by the quidnunc kid at 8:38 AM on November 15, 2012
I think any day would be equally fine for me (though individual dates may have conflicts), and I could even maybe swing weekday lunch if need be, though that would be the least easy option, trying to get from work to Times Square to work again in a reasonable timeframe.
I would like to respectfully request that you sculpt a part-portion of roasted garlic mash into a likeness of quidnunc kid and treat said fetish-totem as my avatar throughout this meetup. I am prepared to paypal someone $7.50 plus labor and tax for this purpose.
If rope-rider doesn't do this, I absolutely will, not even kidding. We can eat it at the end of the meal, meditating upon its short lifespan, like a Buddhist Sand Mandala or a Doozer Radish-Based Tower. posted by Greg Nog at 8:38 AM on November 15, 2012 [4 favorites]
That explains why 'Guy Fieri' sounds like 'Sky burial.' posted by shakespeherian at 8:40 AM on November 15, 2012
No but yes but no? I'm so confused. Good company... bad food... what do I do. posted by spec80 at 8:45 AM on November 15, 2012
Greg I will handle the money and the mashed potatoes if you document posted by the young rope-rider at 9:15 AM on November 15, 2012
"I think the joke will work equally well if we all just show up and begin to rub the outside of the restaurant like the apes reacting to the monolith in 2001"
This I would be up for. posted by Eideteker at 9:20 AM on November 15, 2012
We can eat it at the end of the meal
Well I was hoping you might try to animate the mashGolem with magic and/or electricity, and have it run amok thoughout New York doing your evil bidding. But it sounds like you guys are hungry. posted by the quidnunc kid at 9:22 AM on November 15, 2012 [2 favorites]
"You don't have a clue what underlying motivation(s) I might have for going to a metafilter meetup at any given restaurant or bar."
"the food is bad, and the prices are outrageous. Who's in?"
There's my clue.
"Before judging, ask questions. And if you can't be bothered, don't presume."
I said that I don't understand. Please help me understand so that I can play nice with the other kids and not die horribly alone. Because I really do not get this. posted by Eideteker at 9:26 AM on November 15, 2012
Wait so are we talking this this weekend like 16-18th, or the weekend after that, 23-25th? Got crazy work deadline and projects this weekend that will keep me somewhat on-call all the way through Sunday morning. As for Thanksgiving weekend, I have a guest in town who will be leaving Sunday morning.
In either case, Sunday afternoon would work for me. The later the better. posted by kkokkodalk at 9:50 AM on November 15, 2012
This weekend is pretty dicey, and I may be out of town on Thanksgiving weekend. Maybe 12/1-12/2 for a weekend day? Or that week for a weeknight event? posted by Greg Nog at 9:52 AM on November 15, 2012
I was thinking maybe 12/8-9? I'm out of town this weekend 12/1-2. posted by griphus at 9:54 AM on November 15, 2012
Those dates would work even better. posted by kkokkodalk at 9:56 AM on November 15, 2012
Wait I was just assuming this was going to be how you all spent Thanksgiving, was I wrong posted by shakespeherian at 10:03 AM on November 15, 2012 [1 favorite]
Please help me understand so that I can play nice with the other kids and not die horribly alone. Because I really do not get this.
Sometimes doing things for fun is okay.
Sometimes doing fun things even though there are other bad things going on in the world is also okay.
Sometimes the things one person thinks are fun, another person doesn't think are fun, and that is also okay.
Sometimes everyone else may want to do something that they think is fun, but you may not want to becuase you don't think it's fun. That's okay.
However, criticizing the people who are doing something they think is fun, and you don't think is fun, calling them "contemptible" and "spiteful" just because they are spending their own money on something that you don't want to spend yours on, is never okay.
if this is going to interfere with previously scheduled SEEKRIT EVENTS i will be grumpy. posted by elizardbits at 10:13 AM on November 15, 2012
What are SEEKRIT EVENTS I want in unless it's that thing with the butter that I heard about because that is too weird. posted by shakespeherian at 10:15 AM on November 15, 2012
The food network does always say to go to pricey places for lunch in order to be more frugal... posted by Karmakaze at 10:28 AM on November 15, 2012
Does anyone have a problem with calling it for lunchtime, Sunday, 12/9? posted by griphus at 10:32 AM on November 15, 2012
Eideteker: " "the food is bad, and the prices are outrageous. Who's in?"
There's my clue."
Yeah, but I didn't say it.
FWIW, I have been to exactly one two-person Metafilter meetup, and have only ever met three Mefites in person. It's kind of ridiculous since I'm living in a city which has a really high concentration of Mefites. But I also work really long hours and try to give as much of the rest of my free time to my kids as I can. The schedules just haven't worked out.
The restaurant is in a location that is relatively close to my office, easy to get to, and I actually ate there a bunch of times in its previous incarnation as a Homeland Brewery. I honestly don't really care much about the quality of the food or who owns the place, as long as I don't get poisoned and it doesn't trigger my allergies. The prices truly aren't all that high for midtown, and I don't go out much so I'm okay with splurging a little to do something fun for myself. For the restaurant itself, I'd get to go somewhere new, satisfy my own morbid curiosity and hopefully be pleasantly surprised if/when it exceeds the reviews.
I'm not a hipster. And while I'd like to think I have a certain je ne sais quoi, I don't think of myself as cute. :D
My point is simply that I'm not going to this place to waste money and trash it afterwards. Hey, I may wind up doing both, but that's not the overriding reason I'd go. Don't assume I'm being spiteful or irrational, please, just because I want to go to a meetup.
Also, for whatever it's worth, I volunteer, donate blood and do other things for charity on a regular basis, but dislike talking about it. I very much believe in doing that sort of thing anonymously, without bragging about it or expecting kudos. To paraphrase Chris Rock, you're supposed to help your fellow man and not expect anything in return. And I don't think I should have to prove my cred in order to be able to eat somewhere without being judged. posted by zarq at 10:46 AM on November 15, 2012 [2 favorites]
Works for me! I'm with kkokkodalk on thinking the later the better (like 3?) posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 10:54 AM on November 15, 2012
Although I suppose it depends on when lunch ends and dinner begins...wouldn't want to miss lunch. posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 11:00 AM on November 15, 2012
12/9 works! I'm good for anytime! posted by spec80 at 11:13 AM on November 15, 2012
We shall use their margaritas as accelerant, the lard wrung off the calamari as fuel and a rope of congealed donkey sauce as wick.
Who's in, comerades? posted by lalochezia at 1:30 PM on November 15, 2012
In soviet russia, peasant cannot read date! posted by lalochezia at 1:30 PM on November 15, 2012 [1 favorite]
12/9 is perfect! posted by lalex at 4:14 PM on November 15, 2012
My birthday is 3 days after 12/9 -- so be sure to have a possibly disgusting dessert for me (though if I'd known I could just make some suggestion that NY Mefites do something and then it would happen... well, I might have chosen to use my powers more wisely) posted by MCMikeNamara at 4:16 PM on November 15, 2012
I will eat cheesecake for you, the food I only have when the stars are right cause it pulls in calories from other dimensions. posted by The Whelk at 5:07 PM on November 15, 2012
I'm with eide on this. My tolerance of hipster irony does not extend to spending my money on crappy food.....and I'll give help to Sandy victims as soon as my stuff is out of the way of the broken crane. posted by brujita at 6:41 PM on November 15, 2012
Okay, in all seriousness -- we have had other meetups at a time when there were people suffering misfortune. We nevertheless had meetups. Why is this suddenly an issue? posted by EmpressCallipygos at 6:50 PM on November 15, 2012
12/9 is good for me. posted by kkokkodalk at 6:57 PM on November 15, 2012
Still waiting for concerned mefites to start an IRL thread about an NYC volunteer work meetup! posted by elizardbits at 6:58 PM on November 15, 2012 [2 favorites]
My tolerance of hipster irony
OH GOD MY SECRET WEAKNESS
I'LL DO ANYTHING YOU WANT JUST DON'T CALL ME THAT WORD AGAIN posted by shakespeherian at 7:16 PM on November 15, 2012
Good! posted by spec80 at 9:00 PM on November 15, 2012
I am going to go and sincerely enjoy every minute. No irony involved. Sunday lunch? Hell, that menu is PERFECT hangover food. And I get to meet east coast mefites! 12/9 is good for me. posted by whitneyarner at 11:37 PM on November 15, 2012
Should we have a cutoff date for Yes responses, so that we can try to make a reservation for a specific number? Maybe all responses due by 11/28? posted by Greg Nog at 8:10 AM on November 16, 2012
What reservation I assumed we where doing to descend from the ceiling on zip lines. posted by The Whelk at 8:12 AM on November 16, 2012 [2 favorites]
Let's call it 12/2 just so it's an even week because I am the sort of person who needs to have the television volume set to a multiple of five. posted by griphus at 8:15 AM on November 16, 2012
also 12 + 2 = 14 and 1 + 4 = 5 so this should be especially satisfying for you. posted by elizardbits at 8:19 AM on November 16, 2012 [1 favorite]
I just called about a potential reservation, with the rough guess of 15 people attending, and was told that for a party of this size, I'd have to call the Party Hotline at 212-582-2057. I did so, and they said they'd send me a special lunch menu for large parties. Apparently this is standard for parties of 15 or larger, so if we have less people, it may be easier.
Having just received the large-party menu, it looks to be a more standardized thing to try to speed prep times (like, choose an app, an entree, a side, and a dessert, out of a limited menu, for a prix-fixe of $40). This would throw a wrench in folks' plans to just get an entree, or just an app, or just a glowing blue drink. Because of this limitation, I'd say we may want to cap our party at like 14 people max, or just make two separate reservations for 10 people each or summat.
FUN FACT: Guy Fieri himself provides the message for the "hold music" that's played on the restaurant's reservation line. The tinny recording makes his already-raspy voice sound slightly high-pitched and desperate, almost exactly like Bob Odenkirk as Saul in Breaking Bad. "TRY OUR JALAPEĆO POPPERS" I imagined Saul shouting frantically, sweat clinging to a mussed forelock. posted by Greg Nog at 8:24 AM on November 16, 2012 [1 favorite]
I think two tables would probably work well- saves us the trouble of doing a group bill for 15+ people. posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 8:26 AM on November 16, 2012
Hey, wow, that was a good idea, Greg. And, yeah, let's just make two reservations.
Also plz scan and post the party menu. posted by griphus at 8:31 AM on November 16, 2012
I wonder how many will come! It would crack my shit right up if this ends up being, like, the biggest NYC meetup since the 10th anniversary party.
We can make the cutoff 12/2, though I'd be inclined to make it even earlier just to make sure we get a reservation with enough time to spare. Also, speaking only for myself, it's easier to remember scheduling-related issues on a weekday, when I'm already in schedule/work mode, rather than a weekend, when my brain turns down to small-salamander-under-a-log levels. posted by Greg Nog at 8:32 AM on November 16, 2012 [1 favorite]
Just FYI if the place seats 500 or whatever there's a chance your two tables will be separated by like sixteen acres of restaurant. posted by shakespeherian at 8:34 AM on November 16, 2012
PARTY MENU
Yeah I can't do a $40 fixed price menu so limiting the tables sounds like a good idea. posted by the young rope-rider at 8:34 AM on November 16, 2012
Just FYI if the place seats 500 or whatever there's a chance your two tables will be separated by like sixteen acres of restaurant.
Meh, we don't like each other that much anyway. posted by the young rope-rider at 8:34 AM on November 16, 2012
We've transcended mere dining and now are in the more rarified PARTY MENU DIMENSION posted by The Whelk at 8:36 AM on November 16, 2012 [2 favorites]
there are lasers and glitter here posted by elizardbits at 8:43 AM on November 16, 2012
They sent me the party menu as a Word Document, stretched across two pages; I just fiddled with it to shrink it down to one page, and posted it here:
Also I fixed some of the spelling errors in the original 'cause they were bothering me posted by Greg Nog at 8:46 AM on November 16, 2012 [2 favorites]
oh god the words that have their own line like
this
I love that the logo looks like some sort of buffalo-sauce version of the presidential seal. posted by shakespeherian at 8:49 AM on November 16, 2012 [2 favorites]
oh god the words that have their own line like
this
Yeah, but that's actually an artifact of me shrinking it; ordinarily I'd feel bad about messing with their "presentation", but it seems like the largeparty menu is kinda a slipshod thing anyway, so I ain't worryin' that I'm misrepresenting any poor soul in their graphic design department. posted by Greg Nog at 8:50 AM on November 16, 2012
Ah, I see. Sorry for slandering you, PARTY MENU INTERN. posted by the young rope-rider at 8:51 AM on November 16, 2012
I am both intrigued and horrified by the notion of the "triple double mint pie".
(I'm a firm "maybe" at this point, and will commit one way or the other before the due date.) posted by EmpressCallipygos at 8:51 AM on November 16, 2012
Holy shit they charge by the hour. posted by griphus at 8:54 AM on November 16, 2012
Also, okay, fuck it, cutoff is 11/28. You don't RSVP by then, you have only yourself to blame. If you do RSVP by then, you have me to blame. posted by griphus at 8:55 AM on November 16, 2012
"triple double mint pie".
FYI that's SIX TIMES the FDA's daily recommended allowance of mint consumption.
Do you really think this is the kind of place anyone wants to hang out in more than 2 hours? posted by elizardbits at 8:55 AM on November 16, 2012
12/28 is not the date you mean. posted by elizardbits at 8:56 AM on November 16, 2012
I'm sort of imagining us walking out of there nauseous, drunk and wearing barrels on suspenders. posted by griphus at 8:57 AM on November 16, 2012 [1 favorite]
THANKS EDIT WINDOW posted by griphus at 8:57 AM on November 16, 2012
NB barrels are actually pretty expensive these days since cooperage is now an artisanal kind of thing instead of an everyday profession. posted by elizardbits at 8:58 AM on November 16, 2012 [2 favorites]
As it turns out, there really is no such thing as bad publicity.
That said, I may need to take a trip to New York, because I kind of want to see what will happen when you put Greg Nog, griphus, The Whelk, and Guy Fieri in the same room together. posted by schmod at 8:59 AM on November 16, 2012 [1 favorite]
So wait we have to RSVP separately?
I kinda wanna show up just splattered in blood and not explain anything. posted by The Whelk at 9:00 AM on November 16, 2012 [2 favorites]
what will happen when you put Greg Nog, griphus, The Whelk, and Guy Fieri in the same room together.
What great Hairy Voltron, its hour come round at last, slouches toward Midtown to be born posted by Greg Nog at 9:00 AM on November 16, 2012
Er, by "RSVP" I mean "RSVP in this thread."
What great Hairy Voltron, it's hour come round at last, slouches toward Midtown to be born
Donkey sauce is loosed upon the world. posted by griphus at 9:02 AM on November 16, 2012
My RSVP: Re-re-confirming that this all works for me. posted by kkokkodalk at 9:21 AM on November 16, 2012
CLICK ON THE THING posted by griphus at 9:23 AM on November 16, 2012
Oh wait, looks like we can get a large-party reservation with just the normal menu after all. I've tentatively booked us as a party of fifteen for 12/09 at 2 PM. If that number changes, I can alter the reservation accordingly. posted by Greg Nog at 9:38 AM on November 16, 2012
I wonder if they have a "we will not seat incomplete parties" thing and we need to pull some Midwestern senior citizen couple off the street and convince them to eat at Guy's House of Blood Pressure because YOU MUST GATHER YOUR PARTY BEFORE VENTURING FORTH. posted by griphus at 9:42 AM on November 16, 2012 [2 favorites]
(Also, thx for taking care of that part.) posted by griphus at 9:42 AM on November 16, 2012
YOU MUST GATHER YOUR PARTY BEFORE VENTURING FORTH.
We'll go for the eyes then posted by The Whelk at 9:44 AM on November 16, 2012
If they are going to refuse seating for a large party because one or two people who signed up decided they had better things to do or had a death in the family or were suddenly and unexpectedly abducted by ninjas, then I can only assume they don't like money. And the management of Guy's American Kitchen clearly did not start this business because they love cooking. posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish at 9:45 AM on November 16, 2012
We always loose a few members to owlbears on the way there but the onion rings are worth it posted by The Whelk at 9:49 AM on November 16, 2012
Oh, has anyone figured out a way that we can all combine our experiences into some sort of Project? I can only assume we'll be live-commenting the event in this thread, but we should make this a Thing with photos and drawings and maybe a theme song. posted by griphus at 9:50 AM on November 16, 2012
and potato sculptures posted by elizardbits at 9:52 AM on November 16, 2012
I really feel like a dick that the Malibu oysters intrigue the most because I suspect that is the one menu item, followed closely by the tuna taco, that has the highest possibility of disappointing me in both flavor and price point while also making me violently ill. It just seems really disrespectful to oysters as well, which are easily one of my top favorite things to eat.
As someone who had dysentery at the age of 6 from a bad batch of crabs, you'd think I'd be trying to make better choices with my life in regards to shellfish, but I subscribe strictly to the no fucks given school of food. All things will be tried at least twice before dismissal and you can't blame a foodstuff for your food borne illness. There are outliers, like sea pineapples, which I knew on first try I'd probably never touch again, but if a month long hospital stay didn't stop me from eating crabs and other shellfish ever again, these motherfucking oysters can bring it. posted by kkokkodalk at 9:52 AM on November 16, 2012 [4 favorites]
a Thing with photos and drawings and maybe a theme song.
Journey To The Center Of Times Square.
Well need a bard. posted by The Whelk at 9:59 AM on November 16, 2012
I could probably be talked into such a thing. posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 10:18 AM on November 16, 2012
I *think* I can make this. Was supposed to be in Boston for the weekend, but am pretty sure that's about to be cancelled. Putting 'maybe.' Will confirm by Weds. posted by zarq at 10:21 AM on November 16, 2012
I'm just going to assign you all classes and alignments for my own amusement. posted by The Whelk at 10:24 AM on November 16, 2012
My mashGolem is invulnerable to edged weapons and I believe is "neutral", in both alignment and taste. posted by the quidnunc kid at 11:20 AM on November 16, 2012 [1 favorite]
I am checking on the date this weekend and will have a firm Y or N by Monday or Tuesday. I am very, very interested in looking the beast directly in the eye. posted by mintcake! at 12:51 PM on November 16, 2012
I could probably be talked into such a thing.
Cool! I had my eye on one of the freakish dessert concoctions but if we do decide to split you can have the final say. posted by the young rope-rider at 3:25 PM on November 16, 2012
WOW that's an expensive kid's menu. $13 for a PB&J!? posted by lalex at 4:19 PM on November 16, 2012
Why the fuck not am i rite posted by showbiz_liz at 4:20 PM on November 16, 2012
I AM IN. This will be my first ever MeFi meetup and I've been a member since 2005. I can't believe this is the thing that did it.
(And for those keeping score: I'll try not to eat too much or spend too much. I have made three trips to the Rockaways from Connecticut to deliver full carloads of things. Also, I voted for your favorite candidate a week and a half ago.) posted by houseofdanie at 5:43 PM on November 16, 2012 [1 favorite]
Also, I voted for your favorite candidate a week and a half ago.
But Flavortown is a dictatorship. posted by mintcake! at 6:01 PM on November 16, 2012
I would like to come to this because you are all neat but I a) am super poor and b) vowed years ago that I would never again engage in check splitting with any party larger than 4. So might I come just for the company and to experience America? We can tell the waitstaff that I am on the seven-day donkeysauce cleanse but have already had my daily allowance, or something.
And then maybe we can paint our nails sparkly blue? posted by davidjmcgee at 1:08 AM on November 17, 2012
Count me in. posted by kithrater at 1:38 AM on November 17, 2012
I better go exchange my currency now while these prices look reasonable. posted by kithrater at 1:54 AM on November 17, 2012
...vowed years ago that I would never again engage in check splitting with any party larger than 4....
Yeah I think everyone should throw the money in a hat at the time of ordering because, man, I love meetups but splitting a check after everyone's already hammered is ridiculous. posted by griphus at 7:31 AM on November 17, 2012 [2 favorites]
david, I will give you some of my drink that I am splitting with someone if you'd like! posted by the young rope-rider at 7:43 AM on November 17, 2012
I better go exchange my currency now while these prices look reasonable.
This restaurant uses its own currency? This place really is nuts. posted by davidjmcgee at 7:55 AM on November 17, 2012 [1 favorite]
david, I will give you some of my drink that I am splitting with someone if you'd like!
Oh, that is super sweet of you, but I'll be OK. Smiley emoticon. posted by davidjmcgee at 7:56 AM on November 17, 2012
The currency is FREEDOM and also eagle tears. posted by elizardbits at 7:58 AM on November 17, 2012
davidjmcgee, I will stand you an insanely overpriced frozen drink provided we can drink it with two straws. posted by The Whelk at 8:45 AM on November 17, 2012
and those straws are really long and curly. posted by The Whelk at 8:45 AM on November 17, 2012
And every seven seconds we switch straws. posted by davidjmcgee at 8:48 AM on November 17, 2012
thats how you get a cold posted by The Whelk at 8:52 AM on November 17, 2012
I hear the jury's still out on science. posted by davidjmcgee at 9:33 AM on November 17, 2012
the jury is having too much fun playing with test tubes and lighting shit on fire
Wait I meant to link this although that whole thread is pretty great, so posted by the young rope-rider at 7:21 AM on November 18, 2012
I am almost certainly going and bringing my fictional beyonce. posted by Potomac Avenue at 10:24 AM on November 18, 2012
I am beyond psyched to meet your imaginary lady friend! posted by the young rope-rider at 10:24 AM on November 18, 2012
Okay. Only just saw this. I keep kosher and barely drink. But I would be glad to come and serve as a control, should that be welcome. posted by Mchelly at 11:36 PM on November 18, 2012
I asked if the mods could run the numbers a few days ago and they did and this is now the longest IRL thread.
There are plenty of "fun" things that are also really not cool. It's actually very easy to do "fun" things that are also mean-spirited and negative. Or maybe I'm just not into recreational scorn (would that be "scorn porn"?). posted by Eideteker at 6:40 AM on November 19, 2012
[Eid, it's really really okay to just skip a thread for a meetup you don't like the idea of. Please walk away.] posted by cortex at 7:43 AM on November 19, 2012 [11 favorites]
I'm in. If the other nearby meetup goes down we should all absolutely intertwine at some point and climax with a rousing group tourist trap rendition of 'Fugue For Tinhorns' outside the M&M's Store because Run-DMC taught us what December in New York is all about and we're all Official Internet Friends, really. Hugs, you guys. posted by mintcake! at 8:31 AM on November 19, 2012 [1 favorite]
TAKE THAT, SAN FRANCISCO.
*blows raspberry at griphus* posted by rtha at 8:33 AM on November 19, 2012
I do hope y'all liveblog the experience so I can enjoy it from afar! posted by rtha at 8:39 AM on November 19, 2012
I feel like we should take up a collection and send it to NYC so more people can enjoy this, in exchange for detailed live blogging of the entire event. posted by gingerbeer at 8:40 AM on November 19, 2012 [1 favorite]
There should be someone on a CNN green screen set, manipulating charts and announcing that yes, the chicken wings have arrived, we have confirmation in that.... posted by The Whelk at 9:52 AM on November 19, 2012
Karl Rove refuses to believe that the drinks have been served, melts down on live television. posted by shakespeherian at 10:00 AM on November 19, 2012
So who wins in a "Tape their hands together and make them knife-dance" fight? Smart Dalek or griphus?? posted by Grither at 11:17 AM on November 19, 2012
I just want to point out that I enjoy Guy Fieri's show a little and enjoy places like Chilis and Buffalo Wild Wings A LOT. But I am definitely a hipster, meaning that I just allow myself to enjoy things without ever feeling guilty about how it might look to others. Whee! posted by Potomac Avenue at 11:45 AM on November 19, 2012
I'm going to get Bacon Mac & Cheese and eat it and take a picture of me doing it while being like "Hi H8rs" to all of them. posted by Potomac Avenue at 11:52 AM on November 19, 2012
I want you all to look at the sixth line of this transcript: it is probably the best sentence ever to air on TV. posted by Greg Nog at 11:53 AM on November 19, 2012 [1 favorite]
I want you all to look at the sixth line of this transcript: it is probably the best sentence ever to air on TV.
Okay now someone has to convince me that Guy's American Kitchen and Bar isn't owned by the same people as FiestaMax. posted by griphus at 11:55 AM on November 19, 2012
At Guy Fieriās, you feel confident that you are in a Times Square restaurant under the auspices of Guy Fieri.
THE AFOREMENTIONED CONFIDENCE! THEY DID IT! posted by mintcake! at 12:08 PM on November 19, 2012 [1 favorite]
It would be great if we could fill the entire restaurant with MeFites! All the tourists would be stuck outside, looking in longingly at the Bacon Mac & Cheese and the formaldahyde blue drinks. posted by computech_apolloniajames at 1:57 PM on November 19, 2012
I'll double count as a tourist and a MeFite; I can make charming references to the time I ate a wallaby and mock your sissy American "beer". posted by kithrater at 3:33 PM on November 19, 2012
Where is my transporter technology already, because DANG I would love to be at this meetup. posted by rtha at 4:39 PM on November 19, 2012
Kitrater, I've always wanted to take an actual Aussie to The Sunburnt Calf to see how well the NYC version of an " Australian " place and cuisine matches against the real thing. posted by The Whelk at 4:45 PM on November 19, 2012
I'm in NY from the 8th to the 15th. Provided we all survive this event, I am happy to be taken places and fed food. posted by kithrater at 5:06 PM on November 19, 2012
Grrr...
Leaving this on "Maybe" for the moment. I'm not going to Boston, but may instead be sent to Florida.
When do final confirmations have to be in? posted by zarq at 12:01 PM on November 20, 2012
Wednesday the 28th posted by griphus at 12:05 PM on November 20, 2012
Also I had some friends from Australia visit a while ago and I am really, really sad that I did not have a chance to take them to Outback Steakhouse. posted by griphus at 12:06 PM on November 20, 2012
Okay. I should know by Monday. Thanks! posted by zarq at 12:20 PM on November 20, 2012
but may instead be sent to Florida.
OMG RASCAL HOUSE MEETUP FOR EARLY BIRD SPECIAL posted by elizardbits at 12:28 PM on November 20, 2012
OMG RASCAL HOUSE MEETUP FOR EARLY BIRD SPECIAL
Didn't they close a couple of years ago?
The only thing I would plan to do.... If I wind up going, I'd be about a little over an hour's drive from where my dad is buried. So I might try and take a side trip. posted by zarq at 12:40 PM on November 20, 2012
We'll get Bill Murray to play you in the movie. posted by griphus at 1:00 PM on November 20, 2012
I have some really bad news, guys. The blue drink that tastes like formaldehyde? It's a goner. Now our nails will not match our shared drink. Unless.. I bring OTHER nail polish. The plot thickens. posted by houseofdanie at 8:16 PM on November 20, 2012
Bring a roll of quarters; a peepshow palate cleanser is mandatory afterward. posted by dr_dank at 8:49 PM on November 20, 2012
Wait, I'll be in New York until that evening. My morbid curiosity demands that I try to convince the sister I'm visiting that this will be a worthwhile endeavor. Plus, I could, you know, meet more MeFites. That's good, too.
Also, I need to pick up shakes' evil crown to bring back to him in Chicago. He's been extra grumpy without it. posted by BevosAngryGhost at 10:19 PM on November 20, 2012
a peepshow palate cleanser is mandatory afterward.
You ain't gonna find that in Times Square any more. posted by EmpressCallipygos at 4:21 AM on November 21, 2012
fuck now i have to make a crown, don't i posted by elizardbits at 9:19 AM on November 21, 2012
"Make" is a fine word for "pasting cut-out butts onto a cardboard Burger King crown retrieved from a municipal trash can." posted by griphus at 9:21 AM on November 21, 2012
I believe I have a Burger King crown
I got it from Burger King when I purchased food there
WHAT NOW WITH YOUR LAZY ASSUMPTIONS, GRIPHUS
(I am joking I actually stole it from my baby) posted by the young rope-rider at 9:24 AM on November 21, 2012
I was thinking more of those ghastly bachelorette party favors that are tiaras made of plastic cocks. posted by elizardbits at 9:33 AM on November 21, 2012
I USED TO SELL THOSE
I once had to go down to the NYC Dept. of Zoning to ask if we could open a new shop that only sold novelty/bachelorette stuff (as opposed to straight-up "marital aids") in a certain area. The middle-aged lady bureacrats -- sprung fully-formed from the head of Nancy Reagan herself -- asked me to explain and the only example I could think of was a wedding veil with little plastic dongs embroidered into it.
The looks on their faces was fucking priceless. posted by griphus at 9:37 AM on November 21, 2012 [4 favorites]
If I see Bevos at a Goat meetup and he doesn't have a cock crown for me I will be SORELY DISAPPOINTED posted by shakespeherian at 9:39 AM on November 21, 2012
Ok, convinced the sister. We'll be there. Cock crowns can be successfully carried across the country. posted by BevosAngryGhost at 9:53 AM on November 21, 2012
...and if this doesn't happen, we'll obviously have to make one in Chicago for the next Goatup. One way or another, shakes will have plastic dongs on his forehead. posted by BevosAngryGhost at 9:55 AM on November 21, 2012
I will bring the crown if we find away to send it to Shakes posted by The Whelk at 11:40 AM on November 21, 2012
wait are you saying you are ALREADY IN POSSESSION of a cock crown
is this the thing you are saying to me now posted by elizardbits at 1:49 PM on November 21, 2012
It's a regular cockless crown
The Cockless crown is a great pub name. posted by The Whelk at 2:09 PM on November 21, 2012 [1 favorite]
I'm visiting from Chicago. I'll bring it back with me and present it to him in grand style. I'll wear it through airport security, if that's what it takes to make it back safely.
Or if I just want some attention. posted by BevosAngryGhost at 3:22 PM on November 21, 2012
The Once And Future Mefite. posted by The Whelk at 3:26 PM on November 21, 2012
I hereby initiate Bevos as my ambassador of peace to the land of New York.
I have to cancel. :-( posted by kithrater at 11:54 PM on November 24, 2012
Reminder that cutoff is 11/28 for the final reservation number, after which point I shall e-mail Mr. Fieri to tell him of the dozens of hungry internet people who shall appear as if by magic to swallow his great greasy platters. posted by Greg Nog at 9:44 AM on November 26, 2012
I think we may perhaps want to get two separate tables just because we don't want to run afoul of either having to use the Party Menu or the logistics of a 30-person check. posted by griphus at 9:59 AM on November 26, 2012
we should probably get started on our outfits now to avoid confusion. posted by The Whelk at 10:06 AM on November 26, 2012
Prolly three separate ones tbh. A 15-person check is no fun either. posted by elizardbits at 10:06 AM on November 26, 2012
wait i thought we were all wearing our whelksuits posted by elizardbits at 10:09 AM on November 26, 2012
It just occurred to me that I could time things so I hit up the Toys-r-us megastore for my niece and nephew before stopping in for this.
I'm just trying to decide whether "Times Square Toys-r-us" followed by "Guy Fieri travesty" would be a genius idea or eldritch horror. posted by EmpressCallipygos at 10:17 AM on November 26, 2012
Yeah, I'm just gonna tell them the final number, and see what they can swing easily; I assume we'll be broken up into smaller tables. My dream, of course, is that we get 30 one-person tables, scattered through the restaurant, and have to communicate in owl hoots. posted by Greg Nog at 11:15 AM on November 26, 2012 [4 favorites]
No, the toy store is for afterwards when everyone is drunk and fights over going on that ferris wheel. posted by elizardbits at 11:41 AM on November 26, 2012
I LOVE LOVE LOVE Toys R Us. LOVE. Totally unironically. posted by the young rope-rider at 12:50 PM on November 26, 2012
What I'm saying is that I will go to toys R us with anyone but not until after lunch. And then also later I'm probably going to Paddles (NSFW if you google it) so it will just be a west side midtown vacation. posted by the young rope-rider at 12:51 PM on November 26, 2012
Now you have 31 people. 15 and 16? 3x5 and 4x4? 5x6 and someone at the bar?
I heavily suggest people figure out what they want and bring cash. Or at least bring cash. And not just $20s. posted by Hactar at 6:33 AM on November 27, 2012
7 and three quarters of a person per table. posted by shakespeherian at 7:59 AM on November 27, 2012
Did there used to be a comment here from essexjan, saying this sounded like fun?
Also, yeah, totally agreed on the PLEASE BRING SMALL BILLS front; I would also like to heartily second the idea mentioned above, of collecting money (with assumed tax and tip) at the time of ordering. I know this seems a little bit gauche, but I think it'll be easier given the logistics. Also because I have always agreed with this Seinfeld bit:
Went out to dinner the other night. Check came at the end of the meal, as it always does. Never liked the check at the end of the meal system, because moneyās a very different thing before and after you eat.
Before you eat, money has no value. And you donāt care about money when youāre hungry. You sit down at a restaurant, youāre like the ruler of an empire. āMore drinks, appetizers, quickly, quickly! It will be the greatest meal of our lives.ā
Then after the meal, you know, youāve got the pants open, youāve got the napkins destroyed, cigarette butt in the mashed potatoes. Then the check comes at that moment. People are always upset, you know. Theyāre mystified by the check. āWhat is this? How could this be?ā They start passing it around the table, āDoes this look right to you? Weāre not hungry now. Why are we buying all this food?ā posted by Greg Nog at 8:03 AM on November 27, 2012 [7 favorites]
With the reviews this place is getting, I'd think that they would be wise to start collecting the money before the food comes -- or at least getting a deposit. posted by MCMikeNamara at 12:15 PM on November 27, 2012 [2 favorites]
Bring small bills or tiny williams plz. posted by The Whelk at 12:33 PM on November 27, 2012
Is everyone joking or should we actually collect a small amount at the door and order family style instead of individually? I think this is a good idea. I am fairly certain I do not want to finish a full plate. I'm good with bites here and there.
I'm willing to help with this but I can't do it alone. posted by spec80 at 5:18 PM on November 27, 2012
It looks like I might be able to make it after all. I'mma put a maybe and change it by the end of tomorrow. Woo!
(and essexjan, it *does* sound like fun!) posted by gaspode at 9:00 AM on November 28, 2012
I would rather not order family style, no! I am likely going to eat a full Big Guy Burger just like Big Guy Himself. posted by Greg Nog at 9:01 AM on November 28, 2012
Ok cool. Just checking. posted by spec80 at 9:02 AM on November 28, 2012
[Let's just ixnay the off-site drama entirely, please?] posted by cortex at 9:02 AM on November 28, 2012
Yeah I mean it makes sense if people want to split things between one another, but family-style in a non-family-style restaurant is a giant pain in the ass for everyone.
TODAY IS THE LAST DAY TO SWITCH FROM 'MAYBE' TO 'ATTENDING'. WE'LL BE MAKING THE FINAL RESERVATION TOMORROW. posted by griphus at 9:18 AM on November 28, 2012
Oh whoops, by the end of today, then. posted by gaspode at 9:50 AM on November 28, 2012
FINAL RESERVATION is like the food version of an endless series of horror movies. posted by elizardbits at 10:21 AM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
FINAL RESERVATION: everybody who goes dies a horrible food death and then everybody who was a maybe but then didn't go ends up haunted by it and then slowly but surely dies increasingly complex food related deaths.
God, I really hope that doesn't happen now. posted by MCMikeNamara at 3:56 PM on November 28, 2012
Hey, did we ever figure out who run flavortown? posted by davidjmcgee at 5:55 PM on November 28, 2012
MEFI RUN FLAVORTOWN posted by griphus at 5:59 PM on November 28, 2012
Oh, sweet. That's what I thought originally. posted by davidjmcgee at 6:12 PM on November 28, 2012
*revs diesel food cart engine* posted by The Whelk at 6:15 PM on November 28, 2012
I'm only bringing singles so i can stuff them into the cow grinding onstage's gstring. or did i misinterpret what this place is all about? posted by Potomac Avenue at 9:20 AM on November 30, 2012
But if you meant Kraft singles you're okay. posted by ocherdraco at 11:43 AM on November 30, 2012
True. There is nothing cows love more than compressed vegetable oil. posted by shakespeherian at 11:44 AM on November 30, 2012
Ha ha ha they said they can do a party of 33 as long as I sign a "minimum consumption" guarantee of $900 plus tax and tip. I said NOPE i cannot guarantee anything, so we'll see what they want to do, how they wanna break us down.
Mainly, as a former host at a shitty chain restaurant, I just want them to not be overwhelmed when 33 people all show up at the end of the lunching hours on Sunday. posted by Greg Nog at 2:23 PM on November 30, 2012 [4 favorites]
10$ I will write an insulting haiku about you posted by The Whelk at 8:16 AM on December 1, 2012 [1 favorite]
For $30, you get:
- shitty print that you'll never hang up
- crunchy-ass tote bag that makes NPR look like James Deen
- a PDF of the ENTIRE PROJECT
- a personal e-mail from me, the person guy posted by Greg Nog at 8:55 AM on December 1, 2012 [3 favorites]
Ha ha ha they said they can do a party of 33 as long as I sign a "minimum consumption" guarantee of $900 plus tax and tip. I said NOPE i cannot guarantee anything, so we'll see what they want to do, how they wanna break us down.
Yes, we are all looking forward to seeing how they break you down. posted by grobstein at 8:59 AM on December 1, 2012 [1 favorite]
Guy Fieri saunters out of the kitchen wielding bolt cutters, screaming "WHICH ONE OF YOU SLAMMA JAMMAS WANTS TA BE CHOWDA" posted by Greg Nog at 9:06 AM on December 1, 2012 [3 favorites]
What happens if the restaurant says no? Does everyone just storm down the street like a horde of locusts, devouring everything in its path? posted by elizardbits at 12:33 PM on December 5, 2012
If tourists stormed down places, we'd like them better. posted by griphus at 12:44 PM on December 5, 2012 [1 favorite]
It's a slow meandering storm four abreast, taking up the entire sidewalk and pointing straight upward. posted by shakespeherian at 12:51 PM on December 5, 2012
THE ARISTOCRATS posted by griphus at 12:52 PM on December 5, 2012
SO
I hadn't heard back from them yesterday, called again, again was told they'd call me back about this. It's almost like Guy Fieri thinks he's better than me? You think you're better than me, Guy Fieri? You think you're not given to "emotional outbursts" and "social anxiety" and "eczema"? YOU ARE NOTHING, GUY, I MADE YOU AND I CAN UNMAKE YOU, DONT EVEN PRETEND LIKE YOU ARE THE BIGGEST CREAMSICLE IN THIS FREEZER posted by Greg Nog at 1:20 PM on December 5, 2012 [1 favorite]
guys this place is right next door to the Harry Potter exhibition.
wands you guys. posted by The Whelk at 1:23 PM on December 5, 2012
I am sort of terrified that this restaurant is doing so well that they have to deliberate whether to let in thirty people without a representative signing a legally binding document indicating that they will spend $30 apiece. posted by griphus at 1:30 PM on December 5, 2012
again was told they'd call me back about this
I wonder if they've somehow found this thread and are all "Oh shit, what's worse: we let those crazy people in, or keep them out?" posted by rtha at 1:32 PM on December 5, 2012
If they ask me WHY we're all gathering, I'm going to say that we're all Top Sellers on Etsy and we are celebrating griphus's birthday because his pine cone art inspired a lot of us. posted by Greg Nog at 1:36 PM on December 5, 2012 [8 favorites]
it touched us on a deep, emotional level. Like Proust. But with pine cones. posted by The Whelk at 2:01 PM on December 5, 2012 [3 favorites]
CONI-FIERI'S OLDE TYME PIONEER SALAD
Pinecones, iceberg lettuce, thousand island dressing
$19.95 posted by griphus at 2:06 PM on December 5, 2012 [3 favorites]
Is this the best IRL thread ever? Because I think it is.
And I am sad that I am in Chicago this weekend.
So very sad. posted by Grither at 5:18 AM on December 6, 2012
Let's all dress up like Guy Fieri ... I want to see the manager running around yelling into his headset "THOMAS CROWN AFFAIR! THOMAS CROWN AFFAIR! WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU HAVENT SEEN IT! WELL SURE I MEAN THE REMAKE! ARGHH!" posted by Potomac Avenue at 7:17 AM on December 6, 2012
I have a violent physical allergy to anything with hot rod flames on it.
It makes me break out in hammer murders. posted by The Whelk at 8:00 AM on December 6, 2012
OKAY
We are confirmed for three parties of 10, 10 and 11 for 2 P.M. on Sunday.
Thanks for doing the legwork, Greg! posted by griphus at 8:02 AM on December 6, 2012
Thank you for giving them a call just now, griphus! Guy Fieri musta liked your voice better than mine
:( posted by Greg Nog at 8:04 AM on December 6, 2012
Now I should buy a plane ticket and get a table for one and glare at you guys the whole time. posted by shakespeherian at 8:16 AM on December 6, 2012
Instead of music, when you call the restaurant and they put you on hold, they have Guy Fieri screaming about his restaurant at you. Did you know he had a new restaurant? He has just informed you of this. While you are on hold. Calling his new restaurant. posted by griphus at 8:30 AM on December 6, 2012 [4 favorites]
oh god it's actually happening posted by elizardbits at 3:04 PM on December 6, 2012
My god I want to go to this. posted by ColdChef at 4:36 PM on December 6, 2012
I feel like we should re-create the X-Men Cartoon intro for this or something posted by The Whelk at 4:56 PM on December 6, 2012
yeah, the food will probably be good for business posted by elizardbits at 4:56 PM on December 6, 2012 [1 favorite]
also as I've mentioned - Harry Potter exhibition right next door. posted by The Whelk at 4:58 PM on December 6, 2012
Dibs on Gambit. posted by griphus at 5:07 PM on December 6, 2012
I call Beast posted by Greg Nog at 5:15 PM on December 6, 2012
I saw the HP exhibit the first time it was here. Highly recommended if one's a fan. posted by brujita at 5:45 PM on December 6, 2012
Karen and I are willing to pony up (donkey up) a prize to the attendee who most resembles THE FIERI in style, attitude, or... soul. Maybe we should bring three prizes, one for each table. Maybe the prizes should be edible, in case the food at the restaurant isn't. Hrm. posted by houseofdanie at 6:38 AM on December 7, 2012
Depending on the prize I may get straight up Slamma Jamma with my outfit posted by Greg Nog at 8:58 AM on December 7, 2012
Greg, Guy Fieri does not wear a kilt. posted by shakespeherian at 9:53 AM on December 7, 2012
Meanwhile, it's absolutely cape-weather. posted by griphus at 9:55 AM on December 7, 2012
(a totally radical awesome rock and roll kilt with silver spikes and flames on the side and a pinup girl winking also 8-balls that means I'm not old) posted by The Whelk at 9:56 AM on December 7, 2012
CAPE AND FEZ WEATHER ACTUALLY posted by elizardbits at 10:32 AM on December 7, 2012
Flag
It
Entering
Restaurants
Ironically posted by mintcake! at 1:37 PM on December 7, 2012
I have a pair of shoes I recently described as "wearing Guy Fieri on your feet." I was complaining I couldn't come to part with them but can't figure out where to wear them. What is this prize before I commit to putting these on my feet? Otherwise I don't have the fortitude to ironically or unironically pull an outfit around them. posted by kkokkodalk at 2:52 PM on December 7, 2012
I feel the same way about bleaching my hair and shaving down to a goatee and screaming at a plate of shrimp posted by Greg Nog at 3:11 PM on December 7, 2012
I have a pair of shoes I recently described as "wearing Guy Fieri on your feet."
Are they Fluevogs? I bet they're Fluevogs. posted by mintcake! at 3:56 PM on December 7, 2012
Are they Fluevogs? I bet they're Fluevogs.
Ha, no. I've mentioned them before on Metafilter I think. They're blue "tribal flame" patterned Sha Shas I bought in the late 90s that were like a shameful love child between brothel creepers bowling shoes that the family would keep chained up in the attic. Came with a "g-spot" hidey hole in the sole for whatever kids going to shows and cluuurrbbbs in the 90s would hide in them. I think most famously they were the preferred footwear of the lead singer of Lit. posted by kkokkodalk at 5:12 PM on December 7, 2012
i knew before even clicking that you would be talking about those shoes posted by elizardbits at 5:33 PM on December 7, 2012
Came with a "g-spot" hidey hole in the sole for whatever kids going to shows and cluuurrbbbs in the 90s would hide in them
Goatees. So mom wouldn't catch you leaving the house with one. posted by griphus at 6:22 PM on December 7, 2012
Gonna be like 50 degrees tomorrow; way too warm for the cape! posted by Greg Nog at 8:19 AM on December 8, 2012
Probably not too warm for just the cape. posted by cortex at 8:24 AM on December 8, 2012 [6 favorites]
Prolly need the kilt too if the cape doesn't have pockets. Possibly just a strategically (traditionally) placed sporran. posted by elizardbits at 11:06 AM on December 8, 2012
Hey, I'm going to be in town, I could come down for this for the post meal drinks. posted by mrzarquon at 12:42 PM on December 8, 2012
a prize to the attendee who most resembles THE FIERI in style
I will wear sunglasses backwards.
Oh, I don't mean on the back of my head. I mean on the bridge of my nose, convex side of the lenses touching my eyes, with the arms facing forward like strange plastic pincers. And I will not shout, nay, I will whisper sweet nothings to the nearest plate of shrimp. I will stare at the plate of shrimp and know that we would love each other if only there were a way to communicate. The universe is cruel, and communication is impossible. I will lean in close to kiss the shrimp -- a kiss of love and of farewell -- but my glasses' arms will stop me from getting too close. I will cry. My tears will salt the shrimp. The world will go on spinning.
Okay, I'll keep thinking. posted by houseofdanie at 4:22 PM on December 8, 2012
So, I realize you guys have crazy reservations (now that I've read the thread) so would it make sense for me to try to sneak in an loiter, or will be a post meetup pepto bismol party somewhere, if I can't be number 32. posted by mrzarquon at 4:25 PM on December 8, 2012
I think you can sneak in and get a seat! If for whatever reason you can't, I will switch spots with you so you can sit and eat and meet people. Or we can loiter at the bar together. posted by the young rope-rider at 4:58 PM on December 8, 2012
You can sit on my lap! posted by houseofdanie at 5:31 PM on December 8, 2012
Or origami Yoda's lap! posted by houseofdanie at 5:31 PM on December 8, 2012
I'm serously having trouble figuring out which pin to have in my lapel for this. posted by The Whelk at 5:34 PM on December 8, 2012
mrz, you should just arrive after everyone's been seated and be all "Oh my god, what are you guys doing here? I'm so surprised to run into you! All of you!" posted by rtha at 5:40 PM on December 8, 2012 [1 favorite]
Oh god they had a Diners, Drive-Ins, And Dive MARATHON on today (it's like they knew) and I was positioned right in front of a TV showing it for my gym runnings time and HOLT UNSPEAKABLENESS I HAD NO IDEA. posted by The Whelk at 6:15 PM on December 8, 2012
obvsly you should wear the howling commandos pin
how is this even a question posted by elizardbits at 8:02 PM on December 8, 2012
It's the SSR and yes of course.
I'll leave the rest of the uniform at home tho. posted by The Whelk at 8:29 PM on December 8, 2012
I don't think I have ever been as excited about a meetup I'm not even coming to before. posted by grouse at 11:24 PM on December 8, 2012 [3 favorites]
I HAVEN'T SLEPT FROM EXCITEMENT.
Also from partying partying yeah. Partying partying yeah. posted by davidjmcgee at 3:20 AM on December 9, 2012
so, I can't go if anyone wants to take my place. posted by lalex at 5:01 AM on December 9, 2012
Can I take your place? I'm in town for a job interview so I wanted to meet up with some native MeFites. Did I mention today is my birthday? posted by unannihilated at 5:38 AM on December 9, 2012
I can hardly tell my slammas from my jammas, it's like Xmas morning but everything has flames on the side and the radio is playing a 24/7 Reel Big Fish marathon. posted by mintcake! at 6:12 AM on December 9, 2012 [1 favorite]
lord, preserve me from this temptation. posted by sciencegeek at 6:15 AM on December 9, 2012
Do we have a twitter hashtag for this gathering so people outside can follow along? I think we should have one. How about #MeFieri? posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 6:36 AM on December 9, 2012 [5 favorites]
Oh, that's awesome, TPS. posted by mintcake! at 6:38 AM on December 9, 2012
mefieri sounds like an especially unpleasant reflexive verb in Italian.
Looks like there's two dropouts, so both unannihilated and mrzarquon should be able to come without changing the reservation number!
I am slightly hungover from doing karaoke last night but will still attempt to whip myself into a Maenadic frenzy for Dionysos Fieri posted by Greg Nog at 7:03 AM on December 9, 2012
#MeFieri
Brilliant. I'm even gonna crank up the old Twitter account so I can follow along at home! posted by rtha at 7:06 AM on December 9, 2012
YES unannihilated; glad someone is able to take my spot! posted by lalex at 7:09 AM on December 9, 2012
I want you to imagine me getting ready in the morning for this like the opening to Clueless. posted by The Whelk at 7:16 AM on December 9, 2012
That is how I imagine you get ready every morning though, and I am mad that you still haven't shared your outfit matching software with the rest of us. posted by elizardbits at 7:20 AM on December 9, 2012
YAY! Um, I don't know anyone. Are we meeting in a big group first or should I ask for the table or...*bites nails* 30 new MeFites at once. I'm nervous!
P.S. I am wearing black and white striped tights and purple shoes and will look nervous if someone could look out for me. posted by unannihilated at 7:27 AM on December 9, 2012
Okay, so for serious, I am going to try to pop by toward the end if that would be okay? I can't eat anything so I didn't want to be a part of the reservation, but would love to at least rubberneck and meet folks? posted by Mchelly at 7:37 AM on December 9, 2012
Okay! I have prizes. Come in your best Fieri. If you don't outwardly display Fieri, try to channel some Guy in some manner by spitting as you speak, coining an obnoxious but sticky phrase to describe a food item, or quickly erecting something large and bright in Times Square. SEE YOU THERE! posted by houseofdanie at 7:39 AM on December 9, 2012
Are we meeting in a big group first or should I ask for the table or...
It's going to be three tables full of Internet People. I can almost guarantee you will not mix us up with any of the other clientele. posted by griphus at 8:14 AM on December 9, 2012 [4 favorites]
Okay, due to bus paranoia I've arrived in NYC two hours early. Is there anything to do in this bum town or should I quietly watch Spongebob Squarepants at the station until it's Coagulation Time? posted by Rory Marinich at 8:55 AM on December 9, 2012 [1 favorite]
Go to the huge Toys R Us in times square. posted by The Whelk at 9:00 AM on December 9, 2012
Ooh yes! I'll just sit on the ferris wheel, spitting at children. That's Fieri-like, yes? I don't really have a good Fieriesque outfit in my wardrobe, I'm afraid. posted by Rory Marinich at 9:04 AM on December 9, 2012
You should dance really seriously and dramatically through times square and for every tourist who asks you if you are filming something, you get 1 point. For every local who asks, you get 5 points. For anyone who nervously asks you for your autograph, you get 10.
I actually I'm planning on filming something posted by The Whelk at 9:28 AM on December 9, 2012
I'll be taking the newhaven line in to GCT, then over to times square, so it looks like I'll be a few minutes late (thats what you new yorkers do anyway, right?).
But I will be there. posted by mrzarquon at 9:30 AM on December 9, 2012
For the purposes of liveblogging the event, there's now a MeTa. posted by griphus at 9:38 AM on December 9, 2012
I will try to get there a few minutes early, and will be wearing a black kilt, for identification purposes. posted by Greg Nog at 9:39 AM on December 9, 2012
Wait filming something at toys r us? Whelk are you in toys r us? Can I be in your film? posted by Rory Marinich at 9:39 AM on December 9, 2012
Leaving now so I'll probably be there a bit early! posted by the young rope-rider at 9:39 AM on December 9, 2012
I'm in the Weehawken ferry terminal, waiting for the 1pm to midtown. I have nothing Fieri-ish to wear, decided on my odd brown hat, a Bad Wolf Doctor Who shirt, and rings on every finger (though one seems to have gotten lost already in the walk from the parking lot). I also have my giant umbrella, which will be useful for the walking and waiting, and utterly in the way once we're seated. So excited! posted by oh yeah! at 9:56 AM on December 9, 2012
I'm not dressed like a weirdo but I plan to make lots of bad jokes on twitter! posted by Potomac Avenue at 10:04 AM on December 9, 2012
And probably get drunk on something colorful! posted by Potomac Avenue at 10:05 AM on December 9, 2012
And hug Rory until he's like Ok enough hugging! posted by Potomac Avenue at 10:05 AM on December 9, 2012
See you all soon! Gonna get a first dose of caffeine so I will be properly awakened prior. posted by computech_apolloniajames at 10:06 AM on December 9, 2012
Yes if it means hanging out with you folks (I'm here until Jan 8th). No if it means eating at Guy's again. posted by mrzarquon at 4:09 PM on December 9, 2012 [2 favorites]
Next one will be at Bubba Gump, then. posted by griphus at 4:24 PM on December 9, 2012
hay guise i heard of this nifty restaurant
it is called chuck e cheese
i think it sounds like fun times posted by elizardbits at 5:50 PM on December 9, 2012
Oh man this woukd've been ten times better with a ball pit. posted by The Whelk at 5:51 PM on December 9, 2012
You're a birthday star with Chuck E. Cheese
You're a special guest, we all aim to please
You're a big time, big star, goin' far
Here's to you our birthday star posted by shakespeherian at 6:00 PM on December 9, 2012
>Oh man this woukd've been ten times better with a ball pit.
Yes I agree! You were all much fun and it would be nice to do this again.
Oh man this woukd've been ten times better with a ball pit.
If we can get this many people again I propose we find a room somewhere to fill up with balloons, because that's like having a ball pit but THERE IS ENOUGH OF THEM TO LIVE INSIDE.
Literally fill up, though. Like up to the very top. Also it would have to be a room with a window because otherwise people will suffocate. I made that mistake once. posted by Rory Marinich at 8:19 PM on December 9, 2012 [1 favorite]
this is nyc, there are plenty of rooms that can be filled entirely with like 3 dozen standard sized balloons. some of these rooms are occupied by multiple roommates each pay $1,000 for the privilege. posted by elizardbits at 8:26 PM on December 9, 2012
yeah but would any of those roommates, like, not charge us any money for giving them free millions of blaloons posted by Rory Marinich at 8:46 PM on December 9, 2012
dudes the answer to this, like all things, is a huge bouncy castle. posted by The Whelk at 8:55 PM on December 9, 2012
there was a bouncy castle outside the school across the street from my office a few months back. i was late to work becaue i tried to sneak onto the bouncy castle.
you know as an adult you can rent your own bouncy castle, let them judge, they don't even have a bouncy castle. posted by The Whelk at 9:04 PM on December 9, 2012
I suddenly have the great need to fill a bouncy castle with helium. posted by shakespeherian at 9:15 PM on December 9, 2012
Stay out of Bubba Gump! Please. Trust me never go there! posted by Splunge at 9:51 PM on December 9, 2012
I suddenly have the great need to fill a bouncy castle with helium.
oh my god we could have a bouncy castle party but IN THE SKY posted by Rory Marinich at 10:01 PM on December 9, 2012
and even then we wouldn't be as high as you are right now posted by elizardbits at 6:34 AM on December 10, 2012
You're a birthday star with Chuck E. Cheese
You're a special guest, we all aim to please
You're a big time, big star, goin' far
Here's to you our birthday star
Bowie's lyrics got pretty fucking lazy in the early '80s, huh? posted by mintcake! at 7:10 AM on December 10, 2012 [4 favorites]
sleep-deprived is the best drug, eliz posted by Rory Marinich at 8:32 AM on December 10, 2012
Instead of working, I am Googling "bouncy castle weight limit" and things of that sort. One site lists 160 lbs., but one site has bouncers that'll handle up to 250 lbs. per attendee! I feel an idea for a meetup coming on. posted by houseofdanie at 12:12 PM on December 10, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by Greg Nog at 12:19 PM on November 14, 2012 [9 favorites]